So, this morning I'm sitting here with my sweet chai in my faded blue jeans and oversized sweater reflecting on what the last year of my life has brought and the excitement mixed with uncertainty that leads into the future, the year to come.
If I had to use one word to sum up 2013 it would be "blessing." Seeing all of the blessings that have rained upon me this past year has highlighted in bright yellow that God, in every way, is our great Provider. He truly gives to address our needs, and he does so with impeccable timing.
2013 was year one of marriage for Heath and I, and Heath's presence in my life was/is my greatest happiness. Heath is the man I want and need my life to be tethered to. He is sweetness. Laughter. Nonsense and no-nonsense. He is endless cuddles and hello and goodbye kisses. He is wisdom. Knowledge. Good advice. He's my best friend and my other half. Blessing.
2013 was also year one of living in a foreign country for me. While there were lots of adjustments and countless bouts of loneliness and frustration and thoughts of worthlessness and lack of purpose, there was also a transition out the other side of those dark tunnels. The sun now shines and I have found that I like it here. New Zealand is a nice place to live and there are lots of nice people that surround me--new family members, friends, co-workers, and acquaintances. I feel a million times more content today than this same day last year. Blessing.
Last year was a year of unemployment. Waiting on my work visa and lack of available jobs forced this upon me. I struggled to feel worth and purpose sitting at home day after day, week after week. But Heath took care of us (and Karen too) and God used my new family to show me I still had value, even if I had no idea how this was possible. And my life now! You wouldn't believe it, but I have three jobs. Two part-time jobs in town and my Lovely Lettering business is really growing. Heath and I are not rich by any means, but we are paying bills, saving money, and have two great overseas trips planned this year. Blessing.
Last year was one separated from all of the friends and family I had previously spent time with and relied on. Thousands of miles of separation can definitely be felt in sharp pains and aching longing at times, but technology. Skype, Facetime, Gmail/email, Facebook, even Instagram, have helped me stay connected with those people. Letters and cards and packages from far away also spreads love across the ocean and closes the distance gap momentarily. While friendship and family relationships all look different now, and it's not always easy, it has forced me to grow in the way that I love people. It forces me to choose whether I will be intentional in expressing love to someone, even if it might take a bit more effort than it did in the past. I'm not great at it yet, but God continues to re-shape my idea of what it is to love people. And I have lots of people in my life to love. Blessing.
Now as the first month of the new year has already whizzed past me, I embrace this new year with arms wide open, feeling that excitement mixed with uncertainty, yet stepping forward in confidence and the security of knowing that God has blessed and provided for me so far beyond imagination thus far, and he can't help but do so in all my future days. Blessing.
