"The Divine Voice is not always expressed in words. It is made known as heart-consciousness."
Whoa. Like I said: challenging. I realized that this was challenging to me, because not only do I have a hard time quieting myself and just sitting in stillness and silence before the Lord, but I also have a sinful fear in my heart that hinders me from tapping into the amazing blessings that await when I spend necessary time in total solitude with God, opening my heart to hear what he has to say.
It is easy for us to come to God with a million requests or burdens on our hearts, and he will gladly listen to all we have to say. But too often it is a one-sided conversation. Prayer is a conversation with God that connects our heart to his, and when we are doing all the talking it seems to negate the fullness of our personal relationship with our Lord and Savior. We are missing out on all he wants to say to us. He wants to provide comfort, wisdom, encouragement, joy, knowledge, and peace--yet we don't give him the time of day. I am so guilty of this.
"Why?" I asked myself. To be completely honest: fear. I am afraid that if I take the time to stop and really listen to what God has to say to me that he might tell me something I don't want to hear. That is pure selfishness, and is not the way of a true disciple, and I am praying against that selfishness and fear that hinder me from experiencing true communion with God and discovering all that he has for me. Fear becomes an obstacle in our faith. It is an obstacle that we construct and it distances us from God. I know that I must pray hard to break down that obstacle I have created, and today in realizing my fear, I have taken that first step.
I am fearful that God is asking me to lay aside something that I'm not very willing to lay aside. I want to know if it is something he wants me to lay aside just for a season, or if it is permanent. I want clarity for the future, but this is not necessarily in my best interest. When I asked God about it today and stopped to listen in quietness for his answer, this is what he spoke to my heart:
"My child, it does not matter. It is not for you to know right now. It only matters that you surrender it to me now; today, and each day after, if I ask it of you.
You are not promised tomorrow. Why get entangled in the unknown and unsure?
Trust in Me today. I will provide you what you need to get you through each day, just as I provided enough manna for each day for the children of Israel.
Look at ME. Why cast your eyes aside, only to lose sight of me each time? Look at ME. I am the answer. I am the way."
God provides us with the light of his hope when darkness threatens. He comforts us in his great love, and we can throw our arms around his neck to welcome his warm, all-encompassing embrace. We are his children; he is our Father, and he loves us as such. What a wonderful God we serve! Let us praise his whole being! Let us truly love him!
"Oh that we might know the Lord! Let us press on to know him. he will respond as surely as the arrival of dawn or the coming of rains in early spring." (Hosea 6:3)
Indeed we should exclaim this! Oh, that we might know him. He allows us, in his boundless grace, to approach his throne, to enter into his presence, and to know him intimately. What a beautiful, simple verse. The beauty of knowing him. The beauty of our pressing on to know him and the ensuing journey of faith. The beauty in his perfect, assured response. The simplicity of seeking and finding. The simplicity of an everlasting guarantee.
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